Our Story (the parents):


(Read Adrick's Story)

Today I sat down to write in my son's Clubfoot Journey Journal to tell him the story of how we found out. It is one year ago this week I learned my son had bilateral Congenital Talipes Equinovarus (CTEV). CTEV is a congenital deformity involving one foot or both. The affected foot/feet appears to have been rotated internally at the ankle. Without treatment, people with clubfeet often walk on their ankles or the sides of their feet.

In my previous account of Adrick's Story, I didn't touch much on anything. I didn't talk about the fear that was instilled in us that day during a "routine" ultrasound for a breech baby. The loss of dreams, the shattering of our hearts or the biggest fear of the unknown. I am now ready to share our story.

We had just moved to Montreal and being that we were renovating a house at 32 weeks pregnant, I was not a happy camper. Nothing was getting done on time, and everyone seemed to have an excuse for their delays. Mama was not happy (As my daughter would say). I had one thing to look forward too. I was going to get to see my sweet baby boy at an ultrasound, and it was something that kept me going the last few weeks. Being that I was now 36 weeks pregnant I needed to know if the baby had turned himself around and would allow for a natural delivery. On top of the breech position, I was carrying a lot of water. I could feel and see the water retention. Summer 2015 was a busy one for us in Montreal I was done and never wanted to be pregnant again.

The day we found out went something like this:

The morning was just like any other, woken by my almost-2-year-old daughter who I fed and watered before getting myself ready. My husband was humming and hawing over if he should come to the ultrasound or not (remember there was LOTS of work to do). I told him he should take the time as it wasn't every day we got ultrasounds. So we packed up Adelyne, dropped her at her grandparents and left for the hospital.

We waited for our turn. The anticipation of seeing hubby got me all excited and happy!

We had a routine (or so we thought) ultrasound. We were the Techs last patients of the day, and she was talking to me about my previous ultrasounds and pregnancy. I told her I was concerned about my previous pregnancy complications and that if she could check "them" out, I would appreciate it. We were laughing and talking about our crazy idea to move from Vancouver to Montreal - and why on earth anyone would want to do that. (PS - I still don't know and cannot WAIT to go back to Vancouver)

-This is where things go sideways-

It then gets eerily quiet. The Tech asks if anyone had mentioned anything about my baby's feet at previous ultrasounds. I replied "no" and thought nothing of it. She continued scanning and checked the feet again. She asked again if they had told us of any soft markers that the baby might have displayed at an earlier ultrasound (keep in mind I had had six prior ultrasounds). Nope. Nothing. The tech excuses herself and says she is going to have a Doctor look at the scans.

The tech leaves the room.

...

She is still gone.

...

I turn to my husband and ask him what he thinks. He isn't sure, and the anticipation is nerve-racking.

...

The Tech returns only for a short minute to introduce the Doctor. The Doctor sits down and takes over the wand. He scans my belly again and again. Pushing hard on my stomach, trying to get him to move. Then he shows us the screen. He explains that he should not be able to see the foot beside the tibia.

Okay... So... what now?

The Doctor goes on to explain there are two possibilities. One, my son has positional clubfoot. This means that due him being large (and he was expected to be close to 10 lbs if I carried to term) he was just too big to fit and his feet were scrunched in that position. He told us is the most likely possibility. Or two, my son has Congenital Talipes Equinovarus (CTEV).

Heart drops. Blood drains from my ears, face, and neck. I can feel myself about to pass out.

I sit down. What the hell is Congenital Talipes Equinovarus (CTEV)?

The Doctor didn't offer much explanation. Just that it is a possibility but that it is probably just positional. As he would explain, any qualified tech should have been able to see it easier than now at any of my 12, 20, 22, 24, 26, 28-week ultrasounds. The Doctor tells us he will send a referral for Genetic Counseling to get in touch with us ASAP and a referral to Montreal Shriner's Hospital. I am sure he kept talking, I could see my husband shaking his head and thanking the Doctor. But I didn't hear any of his words.

Montreal Shriner's? Genetic Counseling? What is going on?! I couldn't wrap my head around any of it.

My husband and I walked quietly to the elevator. We walked out of the hospital and got into our truck. Silence. We were both still processing.

We drove in silence for a little while; then we started to talk. What would we do? Is there anything that could be done to help him? What would be his quality of life? Would he know he was different? What is Congenital Talipes Equinovarus (CTEV)?

That night I had to stay at my in-laws, as our kitchen was being spray painted and the fumes were just too much. I was too scared to Google anything. I just sat on my bed, numb and a nervous wreck. I looked at my daughter laying on the cot on the floor. We had been through so much to have her (12 weeks of bed rest, eight weeks being in the hospital) Why was this happening? I ached for my son's losses that hadn't even happened yet. I ached for the shattered dreams of street hockey that my husband had, for my son who I know would want to chase after his big sister and pull her hair. Nothing made sense. There was only fear of the unknown.

...................................................................................................................................................

Shop Now!

Related Posts

  • Washing the Boots
    Washing the Boots

    Washing clubfoot boots isn't that hard. Here are some helpful hints and trips we have picked up along the way!  

  • Adjusting to Casts
    Adjusting to Casts

     The casting stage can be the most trying time for a Mom & Dad on a little one’s clubfoot journey. This can be du...

  • What is Clubfoot?
    What is Clubfoot?

    Trying to explain to friends and family is hard. It is even harder when you're uncertain as to what it really is your...

  • Clubfoot Baby Milestones
    Clubfoot Baby Milestones

    We all wonder when we hear the news. Will my baby be "normal?" Will they lead a happy life? What is the best treateme...

  • Sock Recommendations
    Sock Recommendations

    Clubfoot sock recommendations for bracing in boots and bar or ADMs.